Esskay vs. Armour, A Chipped Beef Showdown

I was very brave this morning, and tried Armour Dried Beef to make my all time favorite comfort food breakfast: Creamed Chipped Beef. I had always thought that Creamed Chipped Beef (also known as SOS) was a nationwide phenomenon. Maybe a little outdated, maybe not a staple anymore, but still a known dish. Oh, how I was wrong! Apparently in regions outside the Midatlantic, it isn't. Some people make what they call SOS with ground beef (the horror!) while some don't make it at all. An old friend who relocated to Michigan said that only jarred, shelf stable dried beef is available. I've found the same is true for Texas. I have plans to have a case of the real deal, Esskay Chipped Beef, shipped to me, but I'm putting it off due to the cost. For a 24-count case of Esskay shipped directly from the manufacturer, it will set me back $74.15 plus shipping, and I feel a little goofy spending that much on a once in a while treat. (Esskay)

Creamed Chipped Beef is a super easy, though decadent, thing to make. I don't have an exact recipe, because it is an intuitive process for me. First, roughly chop the chipped beef, and frizzle it in butter over high heat. From there, add flour to create a roux, and I cook until the beef-studded roux is a golden color. Add milk and cook until the desired consistency. Some people like it thin, some like it so thick that it sticks to the spoon. I usually make mine on the thicker side, but maintain a pourable consistency. Eating wallpaper paste doesn't appeal to me. Pop it on some toast (or as hubs prefers, biscuits), and eat. Easy-peasy and so good.

In this corner, Esskay!

This is my gold standard. It isn't some weird meat paste that has been pressed, formed, and dried, it is actual slices of beef (you can see the marbling) that has been dried. They have a low sodium version available, but unless you're watching sodium intake for health reasons, I don't find the original overwhelmingly salty. I can't believe this isn't distributed nationwide!

In this corner, Armour!

I'd be lying if I said that the fact that this isn't refrigerated didn't squick me out. This clearly states that this is ground, formed dried beef. You'll find no marbling on these slices. Luckily, I read that jarred dried beef is very salty prior to making breakfast this morning. I normally use salt when I make Creamed Chipped Beef to make sure the creamed part is savory and sumptuous. I held off until the end and found that not a single bit of salt was necessary. That is some potently salty dried beef! (Armour)

The end result when using Armour was a pretty close facsimilie of the Creamed Chipped Beef I've always made with Esskay. Once you've creami-fied the beef, you aren't paying attention to the marbling in the wafer thin slices. Once frizzled in butter, the texture is the same. All in all, an acceptable substitute that I can pick up at a local grocery store until I've gone off the deep end and drop a Benjamin to have a case of Esskay shipped to me.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I've had a very heavy breakfast, and may fall into a coma.